Marvel's Agents of Shield

[tencrush]

You know I love me some Joss, guys, so let's just say the entire Marvel universe has developed quite an attraction lately.

I'd post a long thing about Agents of SHIELD, but I have to be honest and say I still don't know any of the characters' names, and this is not due to any issues with the show itself, I'm pretty sure it's great and I'm in love with it, it's simply due to the fact that I'm constantly distracted by my persistent ladyboner for Coulson.



Did I say persistent? I meant insistent. Distracting. All-consuming. Seriously, I have no idea what's happened so far this series.

I'm sure Having A Thing For Coulson is a Thing in Marvel fandom, I don't frequent Marvel fandom. Or maybe it's not, I don't know. I don't care. Anyway, could someone fill me in on the plot and such?

Comments

[off_coloratura]

Well, I am not surprised at all at this news, since Agents of SHIELD is essentially the American Torchwood and Coulson is a toned-down less sexified Jack Harkness (witty ripostes, history with the LADEHS, cool car, back from the dead, cares so fiercely about his team that he will break the rules, seemingly genial with darkness underneath).

(I also am rather distracted by Coulson.)

My current obsessions are such that I have created an entire Tumblr on Colin O'Donoghue's Hook and Tom Mison's Ichabod Crane.

[tencrush]

Hmm, I suppose you have a point. My only problem with Harkness was always simply that he was Not My Type. I do not have this problem with Phil.

I think he's had ALL OF THEM. That's how you get onto his 'team'. And Tony Stark, I reckon he's had him too. But not Nick Fury, that's why Fury's always so pissed off.

[off_coloratura]

I HEARTILY ENDORSE THIS INTERPRETATION.

Also, with Fitz and Simmons it would have had to be a threesome.

FIC.

[tencrush]

I have a fear Fitz and Simmons may be related, but apart from that, yeah, threesome.

As a homage to Iron Man, I'd like to see Coulson actually watching Supernanny because he secretly fantasises about Jo Frost putting him on the naughty step. I want this to be more of an actual canonical thing than it already is. Either that or it transpires he has sex with Lola.



I bet that fic already exists.

[off_coloratura]

I don't think, after the latest episode, that they're related. In my head, Simmons giggles a lot and Fitz surprises them all by turning out to be a tiger in the sack.

I don't know Supernanny, but I can totally see Coulson being into that sort of thing.

Sex with Lola: Absolutely. It is like Doctor/Tardis.

[tencrush]

Fitz'll fuck you six ways to Sunday, whereas Ward actually turns out to be one of those dudes who gets all emotional half way through and needs a reassuring hug.

Phil really loves his car. Hawt.

[off_coloratura]

Fitz is an engineer, he knows all about physics and torque and thrust, and he is good at improvising uses for things he finds lying around.

And did you think "D/S" when Melinda told Coulson to take his shirt off? And his hesitation was all "We're doing this again?"

[tencrush]

Totally. That ties in with the canon that Coulson watches Supernanny. Why else would a grown man watch Jo Frost doing... that thing she does?

[tencrush]

Leo Fitz: SexMacGuyver. Hawt.

[off_coloratura]

I AM BUYING WHAT YOU ARE SELLING.

[tencrush]

DAMN YOU WHEDON! It doesn't really matter what universe Whedon is writing in, all I end up doing is getting stuck with the image of ALL THE CHARACTERS having offscreen sex with each other in every possible permutation.

Which is really all I want from a telly show. I MISSED YOU WHEDON.

[off_coloratura]

RLY? Cause they kind of do that a little anyway.

[eandh99.livejournal.com]

There's a plot? I love Coulson, I love Ming Na's character Melinda, I am annoyed by Skye and irritated by Ward - kill him with fire! you're always jonesing to kill a character for DRAMA Whedon, kill him! - and I'm not sure which one is Fitz and which one is Simmons. The whole thing would be much improved if we got rid of everyone besides Clark Gregg and Ming Na and then brought back the old Torchwood team -- Ianto, Tosh Owen. Tosh could be the hacker, Owen and Ianto could be Fitz and Simmons, lord knows Ward is useless, maybe he could be replaced by James Marsters?

[tencrush]

I think the whole thing would be much improved if Phil and Melinda just went back to having sex like they obvs used to. Maybe it could be one of those sekrit Buffy/Spike kind of relationships where nobody's supposed to know so they do it in confined spaces and abandoned buildings where they can break stuff.

What is the point to Skye and Ward, are they just there for us to hate on?

I'd ship Fitz (HE is Fitz)/Simmons, but I fear they'll turn out to be related somehow. Perhaps all the team members except his fuckbuddy Melinda are actually Coulson's illegitimate children what with him having put it about a bit.