Nos' made me do it.
Jun. 14th, 2006 11:10 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tencrushI wroted the porn with the line about Rose's penis.
Console Envy
“Oh he loves me so very, very much” thought Rose as the Doctor thrust his tongue into her mouth in what she (wrongly, dear reader) perceived to be a lustful yearning manner with only the merest hint of boredom. She could tell how much he loved her by the way he’d shouted at her only slightly Scottishly just a minute earlier. He had been standing at the console pressing some buttons sexily when she had made only her sixth attempt of the day to grab his cock, an advance which had been met with the aforementioned blatantly romantic shout of “OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE, ROSE, FINE!” at which point he’d lovingly pushed her up against the console muttering sweet nothings of “Jesus H. Christ you just won’t lay off will you” and thrusting his tongue in her mouth, as was mentioned before if you read back. Not that you need to, it’s not very long I’m sure you’ve remembered everything that’s happened up to now.
“He’s such a hopeless romantic, the Doctor”, thought Rose lovingly as he romantically grabbed her by the thighs and proclaimed his undying love “I’m fucking busy, could you just leave me the fuck alone for ten fucking minutes you desperate slapper. For fuck’s sake.”
“I love it when he teases me” thought Rose as she gazed at him wistfully through mascara laden eyes. She knew their love was pure and true as he slid a hand up her skirt with a romantic desire that only slightly resembled unadulterated contempt.
“Oh Doctor” she sighed as she felt his hand nearing her oh so romantic inner places and she closed her eyes in anticipation of the consummation of their pure and eternal love. And then his hand was there, tugging at her pants romantically as he shouted at her again in a loving fashion.
“What the hell is that thing? Where’s your penis, Rose? WHAT IS GOING ON?” Rose opened her eyes and looked at him, the love of her life, as his face scrunched up into a lovingly romantic questioning look with just a smidgeon of pure hatred. She knew her eternal love was trying to lighten the mood with a joke, trying to make light of the incredibly romantic and breathtakingly momentous thing they were about to do. She smiled at him lovingly as he continued, “Fucking humans. Useless the fucking lot of you. What am I supposed to do with this for crying out loud?” Bless him, her dear sweet innocent Doctor, he was so unthreatening and clueless that it made her just that little bit moist, in a romantic way. She whispered into his unthreatening ear exactly what he was supposed to do with it, which we, the reader have no desire to hear, which is why she whispered it in the first place, and besides it was kind of tedious.
“You’re taking the fucking piss now”, The Doctor romantically proclaimed “I told you how fucking busy I am and now this? I figured I could just give it a quick tug or two and bob’s your uncle, you know? Tug, squirt, sigh, done and Rose leaves me the fuck alone so I can get on with things that actually matter.” Rose gazed at him lovingly as he stroked the console in what she (again wrongly) perceived to be a purely clinical manner without the merest hint of lust.
He stepped back and wistfully looked into her still mascara laden eyes, “Go on, I can’t be fucking bothered. Not worth the fucking effort”, he gushed romantically as he handed her his sonic screwdriver. “Setting #1246. Piss off to your room.”
Rose nearly wept at the romance of it all as she took the screwdriver from his hand and walked away. “And for fuck’s sake give it a fucking rinse afterwards you dirty cow”, he lovingly added before turning back to the console and giving it a jolly good lick.
“Oh, he loves me all right” thought Rose again as she walked away, tears of pure romance welling in her eyes “He loves me so very, very much”.
The End
Someone please kill me.
Console Envy
“Oh he loves me so very, very much” thought Rose as the Doctor thrust his tongue into her mouth in what she (wrongly, dear reader) perceived to be a lustful yearning manner with only the merest hint of boredom. She could tell how much he loved her by the way he’d shouted at her only slightly Scottishly just a minute earlier. He had been standing at the console pressing some buttons sexily when she had made only her sixth attempt of the day to grab his cock, an advance which had been met with the aforementioned blatantly romantic shout of “OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE, ROSE, FINE!” at which point he’d lovingly pushed her up against the console muttering sweet nothings of “Jesus H. Christ you just won’t lay off will you” and thrusting his tongue in her mouth, as was mentioned before if you read back. Not that you need to, it’s not very long I’m sure you’ve remembered everything that’s happened up to now.
“He’s such a hopeless romantic, the Doctor”, thought Rose lovingly as he romantically grabbed her by the thighs and proclaimed his undying love “I’m fucking busy, could you just leave me the fuck alone for ten fucking minutes you desperate slapper. For fuck’s sake.”
“I love it when he teases me” thought Rose as she gazed at him wistfully through mascara laden eyes. She knew their love was pure and true as he slid a hand up her skirt with a romantic desire that only slightly resembled unadulterated contempt.
“Oh Doctor” she sighed as she felt his hand nearing her oh so romantic inner places and she closed her eyes in anticipation of the consummation of their pure and eternal love. And then his hand was there, tugging at her pants romantically as he shouted at her again in a loving fashion.
“What the hell is that thing? Where’s your penis, Rose? WHAT IS GOING ON?” Rose opened her eyes and looked at him, the love of her life, as his face scrunched up into a lovingly romantic questioning look with just a smidgeon of pure hatred. She knew her eternal love was trying to lighten the mood with a joke, trying to make light of the incredibly romantic and breathtakingly momentous thing they were about to do. She smiled at him lovingly as he continued, “Fucking humans. Useless the fucking lot of you. What am I supposed to do with this for crying out loud?” Bless him, her dear sweet innocent Doctor, he was so unthreatening and clueless that it made her just that little bit moist, in a romantic way. She whispered into his unthreatening ear exactly what he was supposed to do with it, which we, the reader have no desire to hear, which is why she whispered it in the first place, and besides it was kind of tedious.
“You’re taking the fucking piss now”, The Doctor romantically proclaimed “I told you how fucking busy I am and now this? I figured I could just give it a quick tug or two and bob’s your uncle, you know? Tug, squirt, sigh, done and Rose leaves me the fuck alone so I can get on with things that actually matter.” Rose gazed at him lovingly as he stroked the console in what she (again wrongly) perceived to be a purely clinical manner without the merest hint of lust.
He stepped back and wistfully looked into her still mascara laden eyes, “Go on, I can’t be fucking bothered. Not worth the fucking effort”, he gushed romantically as he handed her his sonic screwdriver. “Setting #1246. Piss off to your room.”
Rose nearly wept at the romance of it all as she took the screwdriver from his hand and walked away. “And for fuck’s sake give it a fucking rinse afterwards you dirty cow”, he lovingly added before turning back to the console and giving it a jolly good lick.
“Oh, he loves me all right” thought Rose again as she walked away, tears of pure romance welling in her eyes “He loves me so very, very much”.
The End
Someone please kill me.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Hee!
Date: 2006-06-14 09:49 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-14 09:49 am (UTC)You know that I love you, right?
My favourite bit was when he said “I’m fucking busy, could you just leave me the fuck alone for ten fucking minutes you desperate slapper. For fuck’s sake.” TEARS CAME TO MY EYES FOR THE ROMANCE OF IT ALL.
no subject
Date: 2006-06-14 09:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-14 11:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-14 11:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-14 03:53 pm (UTC)It's CANON!
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Date: 2006-06-14 01:35 pm (UTC)If you post this at T&C I will buy you a pony.
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Date: 2006-06-14 01:37 pm (UTC)They scare me though.
*debates*
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Date: 2006-06-14 01:42 pm (UTC)Chippers, not ponies, obviously.
no subject
Date: 2006-06-14 03:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-14 03:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-14 06:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-15 02:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-15 04:23 am (UTC)*fails at porn*
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Date: 2006-06-14 05:13 pm (UTC)(So evil, but so funny).
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Date: 2006-06-14 06:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-03 11:25 pm (UTC)