*sigh*

[tencrush]

Great how the one time I'm actually expecting casual observers, perhaps even an audience, concides with the one time I can't see or indeed reach to shave it. You know, nothing artistic, just tidy it up. Too much to ask?

Just pretend you didn't read that, move along.

Comments

[qthewetsprocket.livejournal.com]

i think you should paint two little eyes just above it, so when the baby's head comes out it'll look like a nose.

[tencrush]

Very funny, Q. Thanks.

[qthewetsprocket.livejournal.com]

hey, at the very least, the delivery room crew would never forget you. :)

hang in there, though...you feel like it's getting close?

[tencrush]

Probably just wishful thinking as she seems to be suddenly permanently awake and kicking me in the freaking lungs. When she's not kicking me in the cervix.

I'm so done with this.

[nuptse.livejournal.com]

Ahaha, I thought exactly the same thing, once upon a time, and boy was that a feat of bendyness to try and accomplish the task. Yet when the day came I don't think I gave it a second thought.
Worse - I recognized one of the nurses as a fellow I'd worked with years before.

[tencrush]

My grandmother watched my son being born.
*facepalm*
BUT... I had an American midwife who believed in epidurals AND stitching me back up really nicely like a work of art. I've been told she's gone home so I'll be stuck with some tree hugging Dutch hippie woman telling me to breathe through it and experience the pain as some sort of bonding thing, and then tell me my minge will heal up fine as it is, don't worry.
I hate my people.

[nuptse.livejournal.com]

I opted out of everything just out of sheer bloody-mindedness, I suppose. And a strange theory that if women had been doing it for thousands of years that way, it was the way it was meant to be and I wanted to experience it as some sort of atonement. Someone should have kicked me in the head.
Of course my daughter got stuck with her head out so they broke her shoulder and the doc started cutting away at my wotsit to get her out without time to give me any anesthetic. I'm sure he stitched me up nicely and all, but yeah. I watched him sewing me up and thought hm. I have a Frankensnatch.
If I had to do it all over again (and I won't, can't, fullstop) I'd take one of everything including a cocktail, if possible. And it better have an umbrella in the fucker too.