tencrush | Alright, so I'm still watching

Matheson will continue to NOT use any Earth Logic on crazy Joe and will continue to NOT address the question of how he is supposed to dial the phone to save his daughter when he has NO HEAD. He will cry a bit more and blow his brains out (this is why Moran has hinted at the possibility of a prequel, but not a sequel) just as Yvonne and co burst in the door. (Yes I am too lazy to remember her name.) Yvonne and co will waste their time being shocked at Matheson's demise and shouting at crazy Joe, all of which will result in the death of Holly due to police ineptitude. Maybe Yvonne will shoot Joe in the face because of her upset at never being able to follow through on her desire to blow rasperries on Matheson's belly and cheer him the fuck up. The End.

Moran is not capable of anything more cheery than that, mark my words.

Whichever way it pans out, Matheson's a fucking dead man. Personally, I think there'll be a massive twist involving one of these two minor characters who were Twittering all over the fucking shop, but have hardly actually been in the actual show, simply because that kind of feeds my theory that Moran really DID expect me to put in pre-emptive tweeting effort in order to understand the plot. If that's the case, he can go fuck himself with a pointy stick, because his predilection for TELLING us things outside of the things we're being SHOWN on screen (Hello Captain's Blog!) is getting on my tits. YOU'RE the writer, YOU show me, don't expect me to study up, that's not my job. My job involves a sofa and a bag of Doritos.

We shall see.

It's all a bit derivative, isn't it? I've mentioned SAW before, and the thing is, I really dislike the SAW series as well. Ever since the FUCKING FANTASTIC Cube, there's been a tendency in horror towards these long-distance missing-antagonist Rube Goldberg murders, and while Cube dealt with that brilliantly (seriously, if you've never seen Cube, I recommend it highly, yes, there's killings, but they're not really bloody and they're not really what the film's about, it's about paranoia and claustrophobia and it's brilliant on very many levels), everything thereafter has been a bit Doctor Evil, with that tendency towards [Doctor Evil voice]"Yes, I'm just going to put you in a glass box, fill it slowly with water, retreat to a safe distance to watch you drown on camera and assume everything goes according to plan. What?"[/Doctor Evil voice] I'm not really a huge fan of that inexplicable intricacy. I kind of prefer people just getting eaten by zombies or something. Though, to be fair, the Final Destination series has taken the Rube Goldberg Murder to hilarious extremes at times and can still ellicit a stifled giggle even from me. Fuck, they must be a breeze to write... oil drum falls over, oil comes out, wooden support slides thataway, knocks plug from plug socket, fridge goes off, water starts running out, something shorts out, door opens, knocks other support, cans roll, things fall, strategically placed REALLY HEAVY WEIGHT falls on yer head. Lol. But no, on the whole, I'm not a huge fan, and I think the thing with Girl Number 9 is mainly that when you actually INTRODUCE us to the antagonist in question, the one with the predilection for complicated killings, the whole thing kind of falls apart and I, personally, turn into Scott Evil and go "You've just going to leave them?!? I've got a gun in my room, Bang! Done."

You just don't get it, do you Scott?

(ETA: Also, that I KILL YOU WITH THE INTERNETS thing, it's the naughties version of all fifties horror films essentially being about the Cold War or nuclear radiation. It's a bit fucking old. Srsly.)

Threaded | Flat

I'm getting a little disappointed in this. Sure, Joe will blow his brains out and the lunatic will let his daughter live? Ahhh..don't think so. Only two more eps..good thing they're not more than 5 minutes each..not much more of a story to tell. (in my opinion anyway) Unless..there's some huge twist at the end.

Lori

WHAT I THINK WILL HAPPEN:

Matheson decides to kill the smug bastard, rather than give him any satisfaction (because how the fuck does the saving her part work if he's already dead; it's a hell of a leap of faith for no guarantee) and let his daughter die.

Either his daughter dies and he kills himself, or it was all a bluff and his daughter lives, in which case there can be a hilarious twist that he kills himself THINKING she's dead and orphans her, ridding her of a wishy-washy, snivelly parent. She goes on to media contracts and fame and fortune. TEH END.

Cube! Just the other day I was expressing the brilliance of Cube to my mum in comparison to recent overdone horror films such as Saw.

I'm going with shoots the bastard, hell why not. Daughter dies, kills self. Everyone does a happy dance cause its over. Yeesh.

Yeah, I got through the first 2 eps and gave up. What I can't understand is the fan worship Moran is getting from people like its a brilliant piece of work. It's not.

And Cube, besides being a fascinating story, is visually stunning as well.

Edited 2009-11-06 15:08 (UTC)

With Matherson saying that he's the only thing left in Holly's life, would James Moran really be evil enough to rid Holly of her mother AND her father? Even if he does take great pleasure in killing fictional children? Could GN9 really be more depressing than COE, with no smiles to be seen anywhere?

I'm surprised at how little Tracy-Ann Oberman has been used in this, not that I'm complaining because it means more Gareth and Joe.

I'm really glad that I didn't watch more than the first ep. I kept meaning too, but there were more important things to do, like laundry, talking to Himindoors, or reading badly plotted and badly spelt twuwuv fanfic and yelling at my laptop, or reading other people's LJ posts obsessively.

I've been watching it for GDL, though I can't say I care whether his character lives or dies. The whole thing is kinda lacking in reality for me.

But I'll put my money on Matheson living. For the hell of it.

Not watching Girl Number 9, but:

Also, that I KILL YOU WITH THE INTERNETS thing, it's the naughties version of all fifties horror films essentially being about the Cold War or nuclear radiation. It's a bit fucking old. Srsly.)

Sounds TOTALLY like Fear.com

her desire to blow rasperries on Matheson's belly and cheer him the fuck up

If that's the prequel, I am so watching it.

heh, i just watched the whole thing
it was... forced drama at best that i just didn't care about and totally predictable
but you mentioned CUBE! ILU

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